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Thursday, 9 June 2011

Drum roll, trumpets and fanfare and the winner of my competition is:

The judges loved this story with a twist as most short stories of this calibre do! Congratulations!

Count to Fifty
In the years that followed what she always thought of as the day her childhood – her happy innocence - came to an end, Jessica often wished she had just done as she had been told and counted to one hundred. But she didn’t. She made excuses for it; it was cold, it was hot, it was dinnertime, she was tired… The excuses were only ever to herself. And anyway she knew that she had done it – cheated - because she wanted to win. She never won. So she let Martin run off to hide and she started to count out loud. By the time she’d got to twelve she knew what she was going to do. One hundred gave her brother too much time. He was too good at hiding. He spent so much more time out in the garden than she did. She preferred her dolls and her tea parties. So Jessica decided that the only thing to do was to cheat. She’d count to fifty instead. He’d never know, and she could finally be a winner.
            She made her voice quieter so that although she was still counting aloud, no one could actually hear. She reached fifty, paused, opened her eyes and looked around. She saw movement over to her left, a quick flurry in amongst the trees at the edge of the garden. Neither she nor Martin were supposed to go past the trees. It was forbidden. Jessica was surprised at Martin’s audacity, but she’d seen the branches moving, heard the rustling, so she followed.
She assumed that Martin had probably been through the trees many times before. He was just that sort of boy – three years older and thirty years wiser. A proper Just William if only their parents would allow him to be.
            Jessica tiptoed forwards, still counting in her head and glancing behind her every time she reached a zero because her mother was usually watching, making sure there were no grazed knees or banged elbows. This time Jessica couldn’t actually see her; she wasn’t in her sentry position by the kitchen door, ready to run towards whoever had fallen, first aid kit in hand. Jessica felt free. With no mother to worry about, she understood why Martin had taken the opportunity to escape to the field and she followed, her head popping out into the unshaded sunshine.
            Martin wasn’t there. She never did find out where he had hidden that day. She did find her mother though. No first aid kit in her hand now, but instead those reassuring hands were caressing their Uncle James. Daddy’s brother. Hands and lips and tongues, all meeting together in a frenzy, a quick snatched moment which probably felt romantic to the two of them but to Jessica it was disgusting. It was wrong, even she, as a tiny little girl, could see that.
            She wiped her silent tears from her face, saddened, disappointed, grown up now, and edged back into the garden.
            She never said a word.
            But her mother knew.  
            Nothing was ever the same again. 
Congratulations to the winner Lisamarie Lamb, email on its way to do re prizes. 

I hope you enjoyed this competition as much as I did, it has been such fun, watch this space I may run more in the future. Love to hear your comments and feedback on this, I do reply to all.


  1. Congratulations, Lisamarie, great story.

  2. Oh, I didn't expect that! Congratulations Lisamarie, that was a well deserved win.

    Thanks to Lesley and her judges for running such a fun competition. I really enjoyed reading these entries.

  3. The judges throughly enjoyed this story and all entries but Congrations again to Lisamarie!

  4. Sarah, Thank you for leaving a comment on all the top eight stories. This has been such fun will definately run another sometime in the future! A huge thank you to the judges!!

  5. Bill-o-pads! Well done Lisa Marie! You have a talent, truly.


  6. She does indeed as you all do, it was a difficult decision for the judges, hence I post top 8 stories. It was fun to run, will do another at a future date.


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